How You Carry The Load
“You don't always get to choose the load, but you can choose how to carry it.” James Clear
People Carry a Lot
With now over 10 coaching discovery/compatibility calls completed (reflections here), a few themes have come up.
The weight people carry may be the most relatable, persistent, and human part of each call.
My coach suggested to me that people, and conversations, will show up that mirror my experience. He is right (often the case).
I Carry a Lot
Over the past 5 years, there have been some amazing, exuberant, satisfying times. And there have been some brutal, dark, hopeless times.
I have been confronted with my way of being, with parts of me that are no longer suited to the life I am moving towards, and perhaps the worst part is how this darkness showed up and impacted those around me. My beloved wife, and kids.
There were times when I felt like I would be crushed, or was crushed, by the weight of it all. Man, husband, father, son, friend, advisor, owner, neighbor, community member, and more.
Crushing.
It’s Because We CARE
Through my own experience with this AND talking to many others, I believe this weight comes from how much we care.
We care A LOT.
Which is actually beautiful, and good, and can be so helpful and needed in life and this world.
And maybe we could be more mindful of how we carry it?
Carrying the Load Better
I have learned to reposition the weight that I feel.
With help from others, men’s work in particular, I have a better idea of the weight and how I carry it.
Sometimes I can even put it down.
Other times, when things get heavy, I am now able to ask for help with it. I can now appreciate the help. I am getting better at receiving it.
It’s encouraging to have ways to adjust how I carry the weight.
A Helpful Example
My Coach demonstrated this to me recently with a travel mug like this one…
If you hold this out, in your hand at the end of your arm, to the side or front of your body, it gets heavy pretty quickly. Even though, when full of water, it’s less than 5 pounds.
If I can shift the weight, carry the load differently, place it on my shoulder, or even better, put it in a backpack or carrying case, I can carry it forever. I may not even think about it anymore.
What Weight Do You Carry, How Do You Carry It?
If you can relate to this, what weight do you carry?
Do you need to carry it?
How do you carry it?
Is it possible to set it down?
Why do we carry this weight? Why does it feel so heavy?
Can you Care without Carrying it all?
Can you get help with it?
Relatable?
If you can relate, congratulations - you are human!
Would love to hear about it.
Keep going.