Embrace the Imposter
What if Imposter Syndrome is a feature? What if it's required to grow?
“My imposter syndrome has its own imposter syndrome.”
For Context
Syndrome is a set of signs, symptoms, traits, or patterns that commonly appear together.
Imposter is a person who pretends to be someone else, or who deceives others by assuming a false identity or claiming qualifications, credentials, or authority they don’t actually have.
Imposter Syndrome is a persistent internal experience of self-doubt where someone attributes their success to luck or timing rather than their own ability, and fears being “found out.”
Reframe:
What if Imposter Syndrome is a good thing?
What if the Imposter is a sign you are at or beyond your edge?
What if this is how we know we are on the right track or in the right room?
What if the Imposter must show up in order for you to grow?
“My secret talent is looking like I know what I’m doing.”
You Are Not Special
Turns out, everyone deals with this…
“Imposter syndrome doesn’t discriminate; it affects everyone from college students to CEOs. People from every demographic who are clever, driven, articulate, creative and successful have difficulty in acknowledging their achievements.” — Dr. Jessamy Hibberd (psychologist, author of The Imposter Cure)
…Well, everyone who is pushing their limits, seeking to grow, expanding into unfamiliar terrain, taking risks, and putting themselves into the world.
And it’s all the way up…
"I have written 11 books but each time I think, 'Uh-oh, they're going to find out now. I've run a game on everybody, and they're going to find me out.'" — Maya Angelou
(There are a number of other examples at the bottom of this post from Tina Fey, to Meryl Streep and Lady Gaga.)
What kicked off this examination were a few words from Rich Litvin, co-author of The Prosperous Coach and world class coach extraordinaire.
“Most people hope that one day they’ll no longer feel Imposter Syndrome. But the truth is that if you don’t feel Imposter Syndrome, you’re not playing big enough. For top performers, Imposter Syndrome isn’t a bug, it’s a feature.”
—Rich Litvin
The Imposter is a Feature?!
That last part from Litvin is what rocked my world and brought me here to explore this further.
The Imposter as a feature.
The feeling of not being good enough, of self doubt, of worrying about being found out — is actually required to grow.
That the Imposter feeling is your ancient safety system. It's trying to protect you from risk, and it gets loudest right when you're growing.
Right at the point of intersecting with your new identity the Imposter will be screaming the loudest. Talking you back to your old identity. Stalling your expansion.
Keeping you safe.
But we didn’t come here to be safe did we?
We are here to squeeze all the juice out of life.
Every last drop.
Dancing With the Imposter
Okay great, we may agree the Imposter arrives when we are expanding and that it might be necessary to get where we want to go.
How does one deal with their Imposter?
One way is to notice it and name it as it is. "This is the imposter voice." Just like labeling a pop-up ad.
You can also give the Imposter a seat at your boardroom table. Bring them into the conversation. Welcome them, thank them, acknowledge that you see them, then keep fucking going with what you are doing.
You can anchor yourself in something solid.
What you know. What you've done, or even why this matters to you. Remember your “why”.
And take the next small step, even if it's uncomfortable. It's the tiny actions that teach your nervous system, "hey, we're safe here."
Get Help
I also emphatically recommend getting some support. Some help. Someone to talk to when the Imposter shows up. This is a great place for Coaching to have an impact.
Find someone to hold the vision of your life when you get caught in the weeds.
“I told my boss I have imposter syndrome. He said, ‘You’re not qualified enough to have that.’”
Some Big Names Dealing with the Imposter
Tina Fey: "The beauty of the impostor syndrome is you vacillate between extreme egomania and a complete feeling of: 'I'm a fraud! Oh God, they're on to me! I'm a fraud!' So you just try to ride the egomania when it comes and enjoy it, and then slide through the idea of fraud."
Meryl Streep: "When I won the Oscar, I thought it was a fluke. I thought everybody would find out, and they'd take it back. They'd come to my house, knocking on the door, 'Excuse me, we meant to give that to someone else. That was going to Meryl Streep.'"
Lady Gaga: “I still sometimes feel like a loser kid in high school and I just have to pick myself up and tell myself that I’m a superstar every morning so that I can get through this day.”
Sophia Amoruso: “Is anyone ever 100% qualified for anything... HELL NO. I’m certainly not.”
Here to Help You Work With Your Imposter
This is familiar terrain. My Imposter is very convincing and I have some good moves and can dance with it.
Would love to talk about this.
Leave a comment.
You can find me here.
Thanks for reading.